WTF Life?

You know, sometimes I wonder, why the fuck is life so difficult? Like, is it really necessary for things to be so hard? Why can't life just be simple? Why can't we just live our days eating and having lots of sex? Isn't that what life used to be like? What happened? When did we have to become these impossibly high-powered individuals that need to perform tasks like fucking worker bees to please their queen?

And who decided that the world needed to revolve around meaningless pieces of paper? Countries can't even agree on which meaningless piece of paper to value. And each of those meaningless pieces of paper has some kind of relative value to the next. WTF? Do people not realize how fucking stupid that shit is?

Maybe the world needs to stop living in relativity and live in absolution. We should only live according to absolute truths. Like our own feelings, or the way the sun sets, or the way music sounds, or the way fire burns. Why live according to relative things like money or ethics?

Moral of this story: Live in absolution.

Sorry

This had to be erased due to the fact that I have to use this blog site for something relating to my professional future.

5 Random Things That Piss Me Off

1. People who stand on the left side of the escalator

The right side is for standing, the left side is for walking. You know this. Next time I see you, I will pull you backwards and you will fall for all of eternity.

2. Stupid reality show commentary

"Suddenly, TJ Lavin shows up and I'm like, "Whoa, dude!"" Very informative, bro. Here I was thinking to myself, "Just who is that douchebag riding in on a jetski and holding an Xbox 360? And how would someone react to this event?"

3. Hard plastic cases forged in the flames of Hell

No one told me that I'd need fuckin' Excalibur to gain access to my new stapler. 

4. Japanese RPG plots

Play Kingdom Hearts 2 and tell me what the hell just happened. And if you use the word "Nobody", I will headbutt you.

5. Ceviche

I've seen about 50 ceviches on Top Chef and I still have no idea what the fuck it is. Stop making ceviche.

College Doesn't Suck (Oh Wait, It Totally Does) -- by Eggman

I’ve decided that college is completely unnecessary.

Here I am, freshly out of college, and all I have to show for it is a degree I don’t want and a complete lack of employability. And this is the plight of so many quarter-lifers. We’ve been duped into thinking that we need a college degree in order to survive. Well, a lot of good having a degree has done me.

I think this life is too short to be so practical about things. Yeah, for a lot of people college may be a good option. But I think it’s only good if you absolutely know what you want to do and you’re certain college will be a stepping-stone towards that. Most people, including myself, go to college because they’ve been told that if they don’t they’re going to end up homeless and uneducated.

The people I admire most in this world didn’t go to college, or quickly realized they didn’t need it to achieve their goals and subsequently quit. I should have been one of those people. I should have been out living my life instead of relying on college to live it for me and take care of me once I was done.

And I think a lot of people are in the same boat. I blame a lot of this on baby boomers who were somehow convinced that their children needed to go to college and become successful doctors and lawyers and other such nonsense. Since kindergarten we’ve been told by our parents and our teachers that we have to go to college or else.

And people wonder why there’s an epidemic of apathy and aimlessness among Gen Y’ers. We weren’t taught to figure things out for ourselves, to discover our passions and follow our dreams. We were simply told that we had to go to college, get a decent education, and get a job that pays the bills and buys us a nice little house with 2.3 children per household.

And now I’m stuck with a mountain of loans and no means of pursuing my dreams because I wasted so much time working towards something I didn’t want. People keep telling me that I’ll be thankful down the road, but as more time passes, the less probable that seems.

I think going to college was probably the worst decision I’ve ever made. What’s worse is that I feel like it wasn’t even my decision to begin with. Go figure.

Uber Liberalism, Bitches -- by Sta

I hate everything ever.

More specifically, people.

And the fact that you have to work to pay for things to live.

Things should just be provided so people don't have to work and have total freedom.

John Stuart Mill said that liberalism is a government that only imposes on freedom to enforce morals and you know, being civil to one another. Other than that, there should be total freedom to let people do whatever they want. Food and housing and healthcare and education keep people from being free. They need to work in this society to get those things, and that imposes on their freedom.  

SOLUTION: all necessities should be provided by the government. Uber liberalism, bitches. Real freedom.

Toothpaste Face Eye Snow Blindness (working title)

I was looking out my window last night, thinking about how it's always brighter outside when it's snowing. I figured it had something to do with the moonlight reflecting off the snow. Then I started thinking about snow blindness. At this exact moment, I was prepping my toothbrush for some oral action. I dragged the nozzle along the brush tenderly, and when I pulled away, the bristles snapped back into place and shot a small gob of toothpaste directly into my eye. As I writhed in pain, I realized that if I were to go blind, it would make for a great story. Unfortunately, I can still see shit, so this story sucks and I still made you read it.

ADDENDUM - [00:12] lexpieces: i think it's the ambience of the city lights that makes the sky orange and such
[00:12] lexpieces: 'cause the moon can't be seen through the clouds